9 Outstanding Picture Books for Teaching Kids About Friendship
“A friend is one who overlooks your broken fence and admires the flowers in your garden.”- Unknown
Do you remember your elementary school friendships? As I thought about the topic of friendship, I couldn’t help but reminisce about the delightful childhood days, specifically fourth grade. I look back on that year with such fondness because my teacher was a saint. She was the first educator I had that understood how vital developing relationships in the classroom was. Not only did she make every child feel extremely special, but she also created a classroom community that was unparalleled. We weren’t just a group of random children. We were a team. We were a crew. We were friends. We rooted each other on, we defended one another, and we had so much fun doing it.
I think we can all agree that it is a fantastic feeling when our students become friends. It’s not always an easy journey, though. Being a good friend takes specific skills that aren’t innate-- we need to teach them. Take a look at this article for eight qualities we can instill in our students to make them better friends - skills such as active listening, setting boundaries, and compromise are essential for kids to learn and the classroom is the ideal place to practice, make mistakes, learn from them, and then try again. The ten books below focus on friendship and all it encompasses. You will find books on accepting diversity, breaking out of one’s shell, moving past arguments, coping when a friend moves, learning to exist in a group of three, and so much more.
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BOOKS ABOUT FRIENDSHIP FOR KIDS
The Sandwich Swap by Queen Raina of Jordan Al Abdullah and Kelly Dipucchio
The Sandwich Swap is the story of two best friends who eat lunch together every day. One eats a PB&J sandwich while the other eats a hummus sandwich. Secretly, each of them thinks that the other’s lunch looks disgusting, and when this truth eventually comes out, it threatens to end their friendship. It takes a huge food fight breaking out for the girls to realize that they’re acting silly, and their friendship means a lot more than what they eat. Students will see their friendships reflected in Lily and Salma and the lovely story of tolerance and acceptance that they teach.
City Dog, Country Frog by Mo Willems
This sweet story would be perfect if you have a student move away or when exploring the topic of lost friendships. City Dog, Country Frog tells the story of two animal friends that go on a myriad of adventures. Sadly, one day Dog goes to Frog’s rock, and he isn’t there. He returns several times but never finds him. However, the story ends on a hopeful note when a new animal befriends Dog. The book is divided by the seasons of the year, so it would be an excellent chance to review that with your littles, or maybe add a science extension!
Enemy Pie by Derek Munson
A boy’s perfect summer is threatened when Jeremy moves in next door to his best friend, Stanley. Jeremy automatically becomes “Enemy #1”. Luckily, the main character’s dad explains that he once dealt with a similar situation and handled it by making his nemesis an enemy pie. His dad helps him make one for Jeremy and tells him that he must pretend to like him ALL day long to be effective. At first, the boy is skeptical, but soon he forgets he is pretending-- he likes Jeremy! The enemy pie turned his enemy into his friend. This book is a great reminder to not judge a book by its cover because people can surprise us if we give them a chance!
A Day So Gray by Maria Lamba
Have you ever had one of those days where you see the bad in every situation and struggle to achieve a positive mindset? The main character in this story is having that problem. Luckily, she has a friend that counters all of her pessimistic opinions with more upbeat viewpoints. A Day So Gray would make a great read-aloud for young students as it could teach them to show empathy instead of annoyance if a friend is in a bad mood. The illustrations in this story are also absolutely adorable.
The Adventures of Beekle: The Unimaginary Friend by Dan Santat
This story comes from the point of view of an imaginary friend. At the beginning of the story, Beekle lives comfortably on the island with the other imaginary friends. However, he decides to make the brave decision to go out into the real world in search of a friend. The quest is scarier than Beekle bargained for, and he finds himself weeping in a tree. It is there that he meets Alice, and they become friends. I love this story for my shy students who have a hard time stepping out of their comfort zone to make new friends. This story doesn’t downplay that it can be hard to put yourself out there, but ultimately, it paid off for Beekle. Seeing this example of courage could inspire apprehensive kids to step out of their shells. Additionally, it could be fun to have students come up with their own imaginary friends and write their own stories about their quest to find a friend!
In a Jar by Deborah Marcero
This story has stunning illustrations and tells Llewellyn’s tale, a bunny who likes to collect souvenirs-- things like feathers, stones, sunsets, and stars. These mementos help Llewellyn remember the special memories he has made.
One day while collecting, Llewellyn meets Evelyn and the two become instant friends. Together, they collect all sorts of things that help them remember all of their beautiful days. Sadly, Evelyn has to move away. Both bunnies are sad until they realize they can still gather items and send them to each other! At the end of the book, Evelyn sees another bunny while she is out collecting, and the reader gets the impression that the two will become friends. This story is incredible for so many reasons-- the art, the imagination, and the lesson it teaches. It would be great to read if a student moves away, as it gives an optimistic view of staying in touch while accepting that making new friends is okay.
We’re Amazing 1, 2, 3! by Leslie Kimmelman
I was so impressed by this book the first time that I read it. It’s a Sesame Street book that educates the reader about children with Autism. Children can be frightened or confused when people act differently than them, simply because they don’t understand it, and education is such a powerful tool. I love this book because it doesn’t try to beat around the bush. Instead, it states things clearly. Julia has Autism and Abby thinks she doesn’t like her because she doesn’t respond right away and doesn’t make eye contact. Elmo explains that it just takes Julia a little longer to process than other kids, but that doesn’t mean that she doesn’t like her. Julia does some other things like covering her ears and communicating differently than others. Understanding is a vital part of friendship. This book is a great starting point to explain Autism to your students.
Hooray for Hat by Brian Won
This book is so sweet! Elephant wakes up grumpy, but he can’t stay like that for long because a hat arrives at his door that instantly puts him in a great mood! He decides to spread the cheer by delivering a hat to another friend. The pattern goes on until Elephant, Zebra, and Turtle have all brightened the day for a grumpy friend. Hooray for Hat is a feel-good story with charming illustrations. It perfectly illustrates how to pay it forward, and I find that that is a concept that students are always excited about. I like to share experiences of when I have paid it forward, or others have paid it forward to me. The kiddos usually use this as an opportunity to be intentional about paying it forward to people in their life, whether at home or at school. I love observing their generosity!
Big Friends by Linda Sarah and Benji Davies
I think we all know that groups of three can be challenging. There can be jealousy and hurt feelings, so it’s important to teach kids that more really is merrier! This is the story of two friends that play in their boxes every day. One day, a new boy shows up with his own box and asks if he can play with them. One of the boys agrees, but soon the other gets so jealous and upset that he goes home and no longer goes to play with them. The next day, they show up at his house with a new box that they have formed into a car. The boy’s sadness melts away and he joins the others once again. This story doesn’t deny the fact that groups of three can be difficult, but it helps kids learn how to work past it, and teaches them that it might be fun!
MORE RESOURCES FOR TEACHING FRIENDSHIP
A large part of being a good friend is that ability to resolve conflict peacefully. This doesn’t come naturally to many kiddos, so I find that it’s better to explicitly teach conflict resolution skills at the beginning of the year. Mini-lessons are my favorite way to teach these social emotional skills. We really focus on I-Messages and sincere apologies during this particular lesson. Click the images below to see more!
